The Wicked Witch of Washington, D.C.

Get a load of this one with the broom....all that's missing are the flying monkeys and the pointy black hat. Look at that face. Totally absent of any joy. It makes me think, "Arbeit macht frei". OK, let's get started... In the December 8, 2008 issue of Time magazine, Washington, D.C. School's Chancellor Michelle Rhee was featured in the cover article. Where do I begin?

Let's start with the cover. Look at the stone cold face on this descendant of starving rock farmers. She means business. She's "one tough lady"! Lazy teachers, look out! And how about that broom she's holding? I guess she's going to "clean up" education, as if it were that simple. I prefer to think of that broom as her magical mode of transportation, whisking her from failing school to failing school, firing incompetent teachers and administrators. She has all the answers to the swamp of social ills drowning our schools. After all, she was an actual teacher for about 3 years. What's even more amazing is that she never ran a school herself, was never the principal of a school. But she has all the answers. Even the caption on the magazine's cover suggests that she can fix America's schools. Funny though, when you read the article, you never do find out how to fix America's schools. Let's go a bit deeper....

When you read a bit about Michelle Rhee's personal life, you begin to get a clearer picture of who this robot really is. According to the article, Michelle Rhee was the head of the New Teacher Project when she was tapped for the D.C. job. She never ran a school herself. She was recommended for the job by a fellow traveller, NYC schools chancellor Joel Klein, who has succeeded in creating a generation of children who hate school and thousands of teachers and administrators who have had the spirit beaten out of them. Rhee was a teacher for around 3 years. During her first year, she had hives all over her face from the stress. The second year, she and another second grade teacher took a class of low performers and turned them into high performers. Of course, there is no data available to support this claim. Additionally, the Time article says she did this with another teacher. So, let me get this straight: there were two teachers for this classroom? Wow. That is a luxury most of the teachers at my school don't have. Ms. Rhee was very lucky to have a second teacher in her classroom full-time to effectively cut the student-teacher ratio in half. Rhee claims that is was this experience that gave her faith in "the power of good teaching". Ah, so it was not a great teacher she had as a child or a veteran teacher she worked with that inspired her, but instead it was her own superior performance that inspired her. Wow. She is amazing!

I also learned that Michelle Rhee got married while she was a teacher, had two children, and promptly got divorced. It's a shame she couldn't stick with it and see it through and make that work. So, just like the teachers she oversees, she fired her husband. Oh, here's a tidbit...just after she finished 6th grade, her parents sent her to South Korea to live with an aunt and attend a Korean school (by the way, she didn't speak Korean at the time). When she returned to America, her parents enrolled her in a private school.

Is a picture of this robot beginning to form in your mind? Can you feel the chill blowing in from the (far) east?

Lets' read some more...how does Michelle Rhee treat others? Well, if she disagrees with your view of education, she will most likely mock you in a whining voice while making a face. She says education is too "touchy-feely". Her response to critics of standardized educational testing is, "I don't give a crap". When she calls her staff on the phone, she does not say hello, she just begins talking when they pick up (so now we know that not only is she wrong on education, but she also seems to be rude as well). While a parent was talking to her, she was cracking her knuckles (again, rude).

What does this cyborg want? What all cyborgs want: the destruction of humans and then the replacement of those humans by more cyborgs. She want to fire educators who aren't up to her "standards" and replace them with "Rheebots". I say to Rhee what I say to all who think this way - let's see you teach! You get up there in front of a class that includes kids who can't speak English, who come to school hungry, who are the children of drug abusers, whose parents work 12 hours plus just to pay the rent, who live in squalor, who are in gangs, who are victims of child abuse, who are pregnant. Let's see YOU do it! After all, you taught second grade for a whole three years with another teacher.

Let's get one thing straight. There are two types of people - creators and destroyers. Teachers are, by nature, creators. Those of us who have devoted our careers to educating children will still be here doing the hard work long after destroyers like Michelle Rhee have moved on to the next rung of their career ladder. Also, the pendulum is beginning to swing back the other way. The Republicans lost the election. No Child Left Behind will soon be a foggy memory. There are whispers that Rhee is being considered for the position of Education Secretary, but I don't think that will happen. The teachers unions helped to put Obama in office and I don't think he will forget that so quickly.

Do yourself a favor and read the article about Rhee in the December 8th issue of Time magazine. It is a real insider's view, kind of like getting an interview with Hitler right after the Beer Hall Putsch in the fall of '23. Imagine how history would have been different if Hitler had found success as an artist, or had found love? Isn't there a successful gentleman nail salon owner somewhere who can step up to the plate and show this glacier some love? Teachers everywhere would be thankful.