Spitzer's Angry Apology

Hey look everybody, it's Client 9.... what's he doing with his hands?

New York's Governor, Eliot Spitzer, resigned today under the cloud of a prostitution scandal (in other words, he got caught nailing whores...). Watch the video of Spitzer's apology at
http://youtube.com/watch?v=GPvA80ZUOZ8&feature=related
My wife wants to know why this story makes me so happy. Yes, there is a bit of schadenfreude at work here, but I also believe that the guy who is moralizing and pointing the finger at others is always the guy who has major skeletons in his closet (see: catholic priests, Bill Bennett, Larry Craig, Ted Haggard, Jimmy Swaggart, etc.) My wife accusses me of "loving a scandal", but simply put, it is not a scandal that I love, but the truth. Yes, I do enjoy seeing false prophets and paper tigers fall from grace. It makes me feel as if there is at least a little bit of natural justice in the universe. Now let's talk about the video of Governor Spitzer's apology...

Is it me, or does this guy really not even give a shit? There was absolutely no remorse in his voice or physical mannerisms. His only regret seems to be that he got caught. Remember, this is a very smart person who was probably always at or near the top of his class at excellent schools, acheived success early on in life, and ultimately wielded great political power. He ain't used to losing! In fact, he probably can't believe he got caught. Notice that he apologizes for not living up to what was expected of him. This makes it sound as if he tried really hard to reform education or reduce homelessness or end poverty in New York State but, darn it, he missed by this much (I'm squeezing my thumb and forefinger really close together)! He thinks he did his best but fell a bit short. But wait a minute - this is a guy who was nailing expensive whores. He makes it sound, however, as if he was trying really hard to serve the public and just missing the mark. No, sir - you got caught nailing whores. Expensive whores. Also, at the prices he was paying (thousands of dollars a pop), who knows what he was having these women do. Very freaky-deaky. He also apologizes to "all those who believed in what I (he) tried to stand for". Is this guy kidding me? We don't "try" to stand for something; either we stand for something or we don't ! He wants us to believe that he really tried to stand for what is right and fair, but it just didn't work out. No, sir - you got caught banging whores. Whores who talked...
So why did the Governor do it? Women will say that it was because he is a man and all men are dogs and cant be trusted and ...blahblahblahblahblah. Men will say it was because his wife was not keeping him happy and women need to keep their men happy or their men will go out and....blahblahblahblahblah. Here is the answer: some people are never happy, no matter what they already have. Some people are lucky enough to have lots of money. Others might have power. Still others might have brains or fame or good looks. This guy had a lot of those: money, a family, poltical power, possibly greater political power in his future, prestige, fame, etc. But still, he needed to bang whores. It speaks to a basic character deficiency in him. And after viewing his passive-aggressive, arrogant apology, one thing is clear. My man is cold. He don't give a fuck.
Here is the transcript of the apology (There is so much more here to analyze). Notice the use of the word "atone". Hey, Eliot - this ain't Yom Kippur. You ain't "atoning". And your failings aren't "private". They're quite public. What you should be doing is kissing your wife's ass and hoping she doesn't put the final nail in your coffin. Because, remember - you got caught nailing whores:

In the past few days, I have begun to atone for my private failings with my wife Silda, my children, and my entire family. The remorse I feel will always be with me. Words cannot describe how grateful I am for the love and compassion they have shown me.
From those to whom much is given, much is expected. I have been given much -- the love of my family, the faith and trust of the people of New York, and the chance to lead this state. I am deeply sorry that I did not live up to what was expected of me. To every New Yorker — and to all those who believed in what I tried to stand for — I sincerely apologize.
I look at my time as governor with a sense of what might have been. But I also know that as a public servant, I and the remarkable people with whom I worked have accomplished a great deal. There is much more to be done, and I cannot allow my private failings to disrupt the people's work.
Over the course of my public life, I have insisted — I believe correctly — that people, regardless of their position or power, take responsibility for their conduct. I can and will ask no less of myself.
For this reason, I am resigning from the office of governor. At Lt. Gov. Paterson's request, the resignation will be effective Monday, March 17, a date that he believes will permit an orderly transition.
I go forward with the belief, as others have said, that as human beings, our greatest glory consists not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.
As I leave public life, I will first do what I need to do to help and heal myself and my family. Then I will try once again, outside of politics, to serve the common good and move toward the ideals and solutions which I believe can build a future of hope and opportunity for us and for our children.
I hope all New York will join my prayers for my friend David Paterson, as he embarks on his new mission. And I thank the public once again for the privilege of service.